Filipinos are well-known to be a romantic bunch. We love anything related to the idea of love, kilig, and relationships. And we really love Valentine’s Day that we have come up with unique ways to celebrate it. So let’s take a look at some of the most heartwarming Pinoy romantic traditions.
Pinoy romantic tradition no. 1: Dating and courtship
While many Filipinos now have a more modern outlook about relationships, there are still some old-fashioned notions when it comes to dating. One of these is that the man is expected to make the first move. This applies to everything from asking a woman’s name to finally asking her out.
A woman making the first move is frowned upon, as this is seen as exhibiting unladylike behavior. The attitude has since relaxed, with more women becoming more active participants in the dating ritual. However, they are still expected to wait first before making their move.
Dating proper
Certain rules govern dates, even for adult couples. One rule is that the man needs to ask permission from the woman’s parents first. Old-fashioned parents will likely engage the man in a short chat to know more about him. Common questions include what province his parents come from and what their work is. For more modern families, this meeting with the family does not occur until after the man and woman have become an official couple.
Dating is also seen in a more serious light in Pinoy culture. Whereas Western culture views it as a quick means of getting to know each other, Pinoys see it as a prelude to a long-term relationship. As such, dating itself can be a lengthy process before the man and woman become a couple.
Pinoy romantic traditions no. 2: Pamamanhikan
Another enduring Pinoy romantic tradition is the pamamanhikan. This is the customary get-together where the man formally asks permission from the woman’s family to marry her. This serves as the guy’s show of respect for the girl’s family, as well as creating a deeper relationship between their families.
The gathering can be rather festive, with the man’s family bringing a lot of food while the would-be bride’s family preparing their own feast. There isn’t any formality, as the two parties simply talk about the couple’s wedding plans.
However, the couple still needs to be mindful of the discussion, as there might be some relatives who would object. They need to assure everyone that everything will be alright. The couple also need to steer clear from discussing financial matters, as this can be a sour point for some relatives.
Pinoy romantic traditions no. 3: Valentine’s and June brides
Picking their wedding date is also a big deal for many Filipino couples, as it is expected to have great meaning for them. For instance, the date might be the same as their parents’ wedding or their birth dates. However, two of the most common months of choice are February and June.
February is pretty much self-explanatory, with it being the love month. The most favored date is, of course, the 14th to match Valentine’s. As such, couples book the date early since it can quickly become full. Others might also opt for dates during Valentine’s week to fit the theme while avoiding the crowded date.
As for June brides, this is a bit more due to general Western influences. In western countries, June is traditionally considered as the start of the summer season, where it symbolizes a fresh beginning. Ironically, the month of June is the end of summer and the start of the rainy season in the Philippines. As such, the symbolism changed, with the first rainfall of the month being seen by Pinoys as a shower of blessings for the couple.
Another peculiar Pinoy wedding tradition is the mass wedding or kasalang bayan. This is an event where many couples are wed simultaneously at a municipal or town hall. The ceremony is officiated by the town mayor as part of their duties under the civil code. February 14th is a popular date since it is the highlight of the town’s Valentine’s celebrations.
Pinoy romantic traditions no. 4: Valentine’s Day at the park
While a grand Valentine’s date is in many Pinoy couples’ wish list, not all can afford it. Many settle for a simple date at the nearby community park. That date is far from boring, however, as many parks take advantage of the swelling visitor numbers during the day. They will often put up a variety of gimmicks like photo booths and games catering to the couples.
Another common part of these Valentine’s dates at the park is watching concerts. These can be small free events that feature local talents and are sponsored by the local government. You can also find bigger concerts that feature bigtime musicians or even foreign acts.
Celebrate romance the Pinoy way
While Filipino culture is an ever-changing one, these Pinoy romantic traditions show that our penchant for Valentine’s and anything about love remains. And while you are not obliged to follow them, seeing other couples practicing these traditions is always heartwarming. Have a great Araw ng mga Puso.